A bird in the hand is not necessarily worth two in a bush. Especially if you squeeze it too tight. Could get a bit messy if it decides to poop in your hand, or it might try to peck a bunch of holes in you. Best to leave it in the bush instead. 😀
Resembles a Costume Party
The Big Apple was the site of this year’s sixth annual Superhero Convention. The three-day event was sponsored by Burpee Cola, the caffeine and sugar-free tasteless soft drink. The convention was held at the famed Macadamia-Hysteria Motel. In attendance were all the big names and long time superhero favorites such as Spiderman, Aquaman, The Green Hornet, and Wonder Woman.
After spending two days attending various crime fighting symposiums, the superheroes got a bit rowdy on the last day of the convention. Unconfirmed reports from several eyewitnesses tell us that Superman was spotted leaving a local tavern, staggering down the sidewalk, As he flew away from the gathering crowd he accidentally tipped the Empire State Building. Efforts are underway to contact Superman to correct this issue.
Meanwhile, it was reported tiny superhero Atom Ant was accidentally stepped on in a crowded elevator. He was not seriously hurt. Also, the police had to keep the Green Lantern away from all intersections controlled by traffic lights, as he was confusing drivers. And, the military tried in vain to restrain the Hulk’s cousin, She-Hulk, as she kept swatting planes out of the sky. In her own defense, she claims it was “that time of the month.”
Preparations are already underway for next year’s convention.
How good of a whistler was Whistler’s mother? Did she whistle while she worked? Or, did she whistle a happy tune?
“Don’t part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.” – Mark Twain
For those of you who remember watching the “Dumbo”.. oops, sorry, I mean “Rambo” movies. Specifically, the one where “Rambo” utters the line “I’m your worse nightmare.” Well, for me, he would not be my worse nightmare. Mine would be performing in a ballet as the male lead, having to catch a 400 pound person, wearing a tutu and tights, when they do their leap.
Can you say “Oh oh!” 😀
For some reason when I was younger, elephant jokes used to be very popular. Among people I mean, not the elephants. But then again, who knows what kind of sense of humor an elephant has.
Um, anyways.. There is one elephant joke I still remember from time to time, and it goes like this:
Oh, one more thing.. I am not the person responsible for writing them either, so don’t blame me. 😀
Q: Why is it dangerous to walk in the jungle between 3 and 5 in the afternoon?
A: That’s when elephants are jumping out of trees.
Q: Why are pygmies so short?
A: Because they were walking in the jungle between 3 and 5 in the afternoon.
I did not say they were all funny jokes. I just said they were popular for some reason. And don’t ask me why I remember this particular joke either. My brain works in mysterious ways; when it does work that is. 😀
If construction paper is used when creating something, is destruction paper used for taking something apart?
I THANK YOU VERY MUCH, kalabalu.wordpress.com, for being one of your nominees for the Very Inspiring Blogger Award. I am honored; it was not expected. Especially after only being at this blogging thing for 2 months.
The rules for this award state that I must nominate 15 bloggers; see the list below. They are to be notified of the nomination and Award requirements. They, in turn, are to nominate 15 bloggers for this award, and pass along the same rules and requirements.
The rules also state the need to display the award’s logo on your blog:
And finally, to state 7 things about yourself.
In no particular order, my 15 nominees are as follows:
1. Eye Dancers
2. Ned’s Blog
3. Momus News
4. The Return of the Modern Philosopher
6. Cristian Mihai
11. A Day in the Life of Shareen A
13. bucket list pubications
14. The Top 10 of Anything and Everything
15. I Didn’t Have My Glasses On
Best of luck to you all. I wish I could nominate more as well. You are all deserving.
And least but not last, for the seven things about me (serious & silly, you choose):
1. if it was not for my sense of humor i think i would go crazy.
A. i enjoy traveling, meeting new people and seeing new places.
-4. my grandfather ran moonshine when he was a youngin’.
IV. i can be a very literal person, so be careful 😀 .
5. i am not as old as i used to be.
Q. i have always wanted to visit europe and russia.
VII. i am very much in love with my girl friend. she keeps me sane.
Again, I am humbled. Many thanks, kalabalu.
Have a great one, everybody! 🙂
MAKE IT STOP! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!
A very old, and very bad, joke:
Q: Why did grandpa put wheels on his rocking chair?
A: So he could rock and roll.
I have to admit, I am a hippie at heart. Although now, I will also admit, an aging one. While listening to some old rock music earlier today I was wondering something.. When Mick Jagger sings in concert nowadays, do his lips generate a gust of wind that blows over the crowd? Sorry, Mick. Jest kidding.
And to everyone else, sorry no, that’s not what I was wondering. Well, partly maybe 😀
As we grow older, is there some unwritten rule somewhere that states we have to change the type of music we listen to, or what kind of books we read, or movies we watch? I remember growing up, some friends of my parents would tell me they used to listen to certain types of music when they were my age. But as they got older, they began to listen to different stuff. Sort of going from listening to the likes of Tommy Dorsey and company to Tony Bennett and friends. And that was fine, since I did not really know who any of those people were at the time. I grew up with The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, and some other funky type music. Can you imagine these days someone walking down the street actually singing the words “Do wah diddy diddy dum diddy do”. Actually, whoever would be singing that would probably be considered sane compared to some of the other so-called music you hear.
I still enjoy listening to the Stones and Beatles, even Pink Floyd and Rush, to name a few. And I do enjoy listening to some of the newer rock music as well. So please tell me I do not have to change my music habits to Michael Buble or something worse as I get older.
But I have also wondered, would the phrase “the boys are back in town” have to be changed to “the men are back in town”?
And for the females of the species, at what age is it required we go from calling you a girl to referring to you as a lady or a woman? No matter the age, aren’t you all still “girls” at heart? (Notice I did not say “little”.) Which would you prefer?
“I think, therefore I am.” René Descartes
“I thought, therefore I was.” me