Jet Powered Roller Skates Now Available to the General Public

The makers of Crash & Burn Roller Skates have announced today they will begin a mass marketing campaign to support their new product line, the Jet Powered Roller Skate, which will be in stores across the nation next month. After many months of extensive testing, and several trips to the emergency room, Crash & Burn executives were finally given the go-ahead by the Department of Transportation, a consumer safety review board, and the U.S. Air Force to sell the jet powered skates to the general public. But, only on the condition that a crash helmet and a parachute were sold with the skates. We caught up with the CEO of Crash & Burn, Mr. George “Crash” Anderson at the LaForge Rehabilitation Center to ask him his thoughts on the conditions. He was quoted as saying: “I think I need a new helmet. You know, they have a special room here just for me. It’s got padding and everything.”

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